I find it incredible that some of my most crushing memories seem eerily unforgettable. I can be sitting around doing nothing.
I can be in the middle of doing something productive, or thinking about something totally unrelated, and just like that one of “these” memories comes hurling back.
I don’t even bother trying to run and hide, ’cause they occasionally find me anyways. Just like the memories I choose to keep, these want to keep me wondering what makes them so unforgettable.
Good question. Why are they?
They creep in and out of my mind with little or no provocation. I don’t need music, I don’t need movies or photos either.
They don’t need any particular reason to occasionally haunt me. They just do.
Have you ever wondered why this may be happening for you?
An article I read at Rebel Circus likened them to ‘dogs pawing at your leg,’ meaning they are trying to get attention.
Personally, I think it’s because I’ve retained an emotional attachment to them.
Let’s face it. Aren’t we driven by our emotions? But these seem to love rubbing us the wrong way??
I love having memories. Most, make me smile, laugh, and feel really great.
Then there are “these others” that make me relive times in my life that I would really really really prefer to forget.
I certainly didn’t like the way these memories felt to me back then. Yet, it’s some of the icky feelings that attached to these memories that seem to be the most unforgettable.
I wonder now if I’m being reminded that I can feel. I do have feelings. I need to respect all of my feelings, not just the ones that I like.
So, it’s not the memory itself that’s important is it? It’s the feelings that I’m bringing up, which just happen to be attached to an event for effect.
I’ve spent a small chunk of my life in survival mode, wherein I didn’t have the luxury of having feelings. No space. I had to make it period. Stopping to feel would have slowed me down. Jammed me up!
Now, I’m blessed to be able to live a pretty darn great life. I’ve moved past feeling like I have to survive at all costs. I’m free to live in the manner that I prefer.
My occasional walks down memory lane then, may come up to simply remind me of this. I’m here, not back there, which makes unforgetting them valuable.
They are worth remembering on occasion, even if they momentarily don’t feel so great.
I accept that I have a bevy of feelings to be used where applicable. Now, I can quickly switch them out for the feelings I prefer.
Thankfully, I now have a choice to feel or not to feel, what I feel, when I feel, and maybe even decide what I choose to remember.
Suddenly, I feel like I can put certain memories themselves away.
Better yet, just let “those” memories go altogether, because all I really need to keep in touch with is the knowledge that I have the ability to feel.
Done and done!!!